Good evening. Or Morning. Or afternoon. Actually it depends on when you’re reading this. Good times. 
In the Microverse:
The newest wave of Secret War figures have arrived, featuring the first ever action figure of Ultron. And don’t mail me letters saying “but Mr. benty sir, there have in fact been 3 other Ultron figures.”
Don’t get cocky.
Actually, there may have been 4 counting the Superhero Squad one. At least I think there was one. But that’s not so much an action figure. I mean, I guess you could have them fight each other, but still. Fine. Let’s say 4. And now there’s a 5th one. And taking a new approach to toys everywhere, this one looks like Ultron.
I personally am a fan of things looking like they’re supposed to, and of beating long dead horses.
Fwooshers don’t seem too enthused with the Thor in that line. Well, lemme tellya…Thor ain’t too happy with the lot a ya either.
Not sure why I started talking like Thing there…
In further MU news, (because that’s all that’s left) that Malcontent Master of Misanthropic Missives Cliff Francis dropped by once again to tell everyone what’s what with things. You can almost hear the acid eating into his stomach lining while reading every word that boils from his fingers. The result is a lot of people who take things really serious. This time his diatribe berated the Marvel Universe figures. Or did it? Maybe it did. Unless? Who knows. And that’s the question of the day. Or last week, because I’m as Timely as Marvel was back in the mesozoic age.
Even more MU news (what else do you think there would be?) There will never be a Thor movie line because Pagans don’t buy toys. I don’t know.
Iron Man 2 movie figures (teeny) have started showing up. At Toys R Us. Possibly more places but research costs extra.
Still more MU news! UK toyfair pictures showed some figures we already knew about. Fwooshers have riled up over AIM soldier, wanting him in the 6 inch line. Plus Colossus flies now. Or something. I guess Hasbro’s got bad AIM.
Hurm,
Next up, in the Multiverse:
The Price hike to 15 bucks continues to make fwooshers 15 bucks poorer per figure because nobody’s going to quit the line. Nobody will. You just won’t. You can’t. You know it, I know it, that “pants on the ground” guy knows it. So learn to live it.
Liiiiiiiive it!
and love it.
Pabs has expressed his angst with Batman’s headsculpt. Batman was prepared for that, and in a formally written letter told pabs HIS headsculpt was out of scale. Pabs reciprocated with a short right to Batman’s Dick. Batman said “I’m standing over here, why’d you hit Robin?” Pabs proceeded to run away. Batman then patted his Dick and said “That’s one for justice!”
No top ten results yet. I’m still bribing Ambush Bug into higher slots.
When Aztek is made, Piffy’s battle call will be a resounding EEEEEEEEEEGG-FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! Mr. T pities tha Egg-Fu.
Series 12 continues showing up. In places. Here and there.
In the Expanded Universe:
Longest. Wait. For. Trap. Jaw. EVER!
And that Battle Cat also.
In the Bar With No Name:
Some fwooshers have never heard the term “the Trots” for poopsplosions. Some have. That definition came from Leon Trotski, who while planning revolutions…pooped a lot. Bad Borscht.
In Comic Relief:
Sentry is well hated. So is Daken. And Bendis. Daken has a mohawk, Sentry’s post Modern, Bendis is a no talent hack. (disclaimer: For real) I doubt he reads the fwoosh week in review. And if he wrote it he’d take about a month to review one week, and the ending would be anti-climactic. Zing!
The Word fwoosh is used as a sound effect in approximately 1.4 gazillion comics. True Story: when Aunt May first had sex with Uncle Ben, if it had been portrayed in the comics, the sound effect would have been “fwoosh”. Oh hells yeah.
(and not as portrayed in that “Trouble” comic. Good grief.)
Speaking of Bendis: the Heroic Age is coming, a return to traditional good versus evil superheroics in Marvel comics. Run by the same group of idiots.
In the Multiplex:
When a body catch a body coming through the rye, it’s probably JD Salinger. Who passed away at the age of 91.
And then the skrulls went away. The end.
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