Welcome back to another edition of Highly Demanded Characters. It’s not easy being green, so what better month to take a look at some of the green guys of the DCU than March? After all, we are all so important to the DCU. Without out us running things where would the DCU be?
You know Kastor usually writes this column, but this week I gave him the week off. I had nothing going on in the DCU so I decided to step up and kick off March, and what better way to start the month than by looking over my illustrious career as a hero in the DCU.
So let’s talk about the great, the amazing, the unstoppable me: Ambush Bug.
Barbara Gordon? Who the hell picked her off a poll? I mean who cares about that old fuddy duddy’s daughter? Who is she? Never mind let’s get to me.
The week’s hero, and I use the term strongly, is a fan favorite. I would even go so far as to say he’s the most popular in all the DCU. I started out being some one who would pop in and out of the Superman books, you know, to give him a good swift kick when he was messing up the story. He is such a goody goody, there are times when a guy like me needs to just jump in and make sure the book is really up to snuff for all you readers out there. You know, when I was first brought in the early 80’s they knew that not everyone would like me, sure they tried to make me the villain, but you all could see I was born to be a star, I mean hero. So I did what they wanted, then I started to do my own thing… saving the world, teaching Bats a thing or two, and giving fashion advice to that great dresser Killer Moth. I really though he could be the next Batman, but he just never took off like me. I told him stick to orange and green, but no… he had to go add purple. That was his down fall, who likes purple anyway? Every few years they get a new writer to try to reinvent me, but I know you all can see it’s not really me. I mean, who the hell would believe I’m the comic relief? I’m the gold mine for the Dan guy right now, you know the one DisThunder likes so much.
Ok so enough about where I came from, you all don’t want to hear it over again. I should tell you a little more about my suit. It used to be just something I decided to put together. Bats and Sups did the whole blue thing way too much, I think green is the color that really makes me stand out as the big guy in the room. I can’t give away all my secrets, most people think that there are these little bugs in my antennae that help me teleport, but my real power comes from…. Wait, then jerks like Luthor could defeat me as easy as Cla.. I mean Superman. I better shut up about that.
Right now I’m writing and starring in my own comic book, you should check it out. You should see the chick I wake up next to in one of the issues. They have the nerve to think that I am the comic relief, but when the chips are down who do they call? Me, that is right. Not only do they think I can do it all while running the whole 52 thing for Danny, they had the nerve to call me to fill in for the duo of Bats and Sups on the JLA. I had to tell that new kid Jason to take a hike, I was too busy at the DC offices fixing the mess they were dealing with: whatever threat the writer came up for them that week. I just went down the hall and told that writer to stop trying to write me into scripts just to get him more readers. Who do they think I am? Just that short guy with those ridiculous claws running around in every Marvel book known to man? For now I have my hands full trying to put that genie back in the bottle with all those new earths. I’m telling you, they are trying to make another one of me, but who is better than the one and only original Ambush Bug?
So while Batman and Superman seem to lead this line, when does the big man with orange antennae get to be made by the Horsemen? I mean, they are Jersey guys, so get on it already before I have to teleport down there to give them a kick.
So when I get made, (hopefully soon or I might pop in and kick someone in the ass like the old days), how do you want me?
Single in all my green and orange glory, censored of course, I don’t want to scare away the female fans or the kids?
As part of a two pack with one of my best friends in the DCU like Batman or Superman?
How about as an exclusive? I really am big enough in the public eye to warrant my own extremely high priced exclusive figure. Who would not buy me? You could include some extra bodies to pop my head on, like Superman or a Monitor.
Head over to the poll and vote for which way I should be made properly for this great line.
Some images courtesy of Comic Vine
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