HERE HULK GO AGAIN!!
simmo asked:
Hulk,
Which Muppet do you like best? I would like to see you annihilate all fraggles personally.
RAARGH, HULK HATE FRAGGLES. HULK THINK GONZO OKAY, AND FOZZIE, AND OBVIOUSLY HULK GOT NO COMPLAINTS WITH KERMIT. HOWEVER, HULK FAVORITE MUPPET SWEDISH CHEF. BORK BORK BORK. HULK LIKE TO SAY BORK BORK BORK.
spiderdood90 asked:
Hulk, who’s your favourite Samuel ‘Mother F$£%in’ Jackson or Bruce ‘Hail to the King’ Campbell?
HULK THINK BOTH AWESOME. HULK THINK MOVIE WITH BOTH OF THEM STAGGER IMAGINATION. IT CALLED "AWESOME MOVIE" AND IT MAKE FORTY GAJILLION DOLLARS. ALL MOVIE CONSIST OF SAM AND BRUCE STANDING ‘ROUND TALKING. AUDIENCE GO WILD. WOMEN SWOON. MEN FAINT. BABIES CRY. CHILDREN EXPLODE. LEAVE THEATER, GO BLIND, NEVER SEE ANOTHER MOVIE AGAIN, BUT NEVER NEED TO, CAUSE YOU’VE SEEN AWESOME MOVIE.
Also, could you do me a favour and Rochambeau Shell Head for me…
Cheers dude!
DONE!
chuck20 asked:
Hulk,
How do you keep from smelling terrible? I would think that smashing so much would produce terrible BO.
HULK DOESN’T SWEAT. SWEAT SCARED OF HULK. HULK SWEAT ONCE, JUST ONCE, HULK SAID "NO SWEAT" AND IT SUCKEED BACK INTO PORES. NOT WORY ABOUT IT AGAIN!
Oh and how do you plan to smash Dr. Strange, it seems like he would be hard to smash.
HULK SMASH STRANGE BY SMASHING WONG. TEAR HIM IN TWO. TWO WONGS MAKE RIGHT. STRANGE CRY LIKE BABY. HULK SMASH. THE END.
SammaeL asked:
Hulk,
Better beer,American or Canadian?
RAARGH, HULK WAS IN CANADA, FOUGHT CANADIAN BEER. IT WAS BIG, HULK BIGGER. AMERICAN BEER NOT MUCH OF FIGHT. LAZY BEERS. WAIT… HULK MISUNDERSTAND AGAIN… HULK CAN’T SPELL
Discogod asked:
Hulk,
All the smashing and destruction – it’s a cry for help, isn’t it?
C’mere big guy. Give me a hug.
You wanna cookie?
HULK…HULK ONLY WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO NOTICE. HULK REALLY NOT WANT TO SMASH. HULK WANTED TO BE BALLERINA. WANT TO DANCE. HULK FEEL SMASHING MAY BE PLAYED OUT. WANT TO WEAR TUTU, LEOTARD. BUT THEY SAY HULK TOO FAT. SO HULK DO WHAT HULK CAN DO. HULK SMASH!! HULK TAKE COOKIE NOW. AND HUG.
Popoman asked:
Hulk…How do you deal with racial issues? It seems like people would protest the avengers, seeing as they have a green man among their ranks. I hate it that people are prejudice against green people, but that’s just the way it is…
WHEN QUESTION COMES UP, HULK POINT TO ANY ISSUE OF JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA. IF JLA CAN HAVE MARTIAN MANHUNTER, AVENGERS CAN HAVE HULK. BUT THEY DON’T WANT HULK. THEY LIKE SHE-HULK. AGAIN WITH THE SEXINESS. HULK SIT BY PHONE, WAITING FOR CALL, BUT CALL NEVER COMES. THEN HULK REMEMBER HULK DOESN’T HAVE PHONE, AND BLENDER NEVER GONNA RING.
Lucid Silverback Esq. asked:
I noticed you have recently been involved with an improvisational musical endeavor… What has it been like going from "urban chaos bringer" to "hep rock-n-roll lead singer"?
And, any tips for the younger rockers out there?
RAARGH IF YOU’RE GUY, STOP WEARING EYELINER!!!
Kirk asked:
HULK ….. have you ever internshiped?
HULK DID ONCE. HAD TO WEAR SUIT. LONG HOURS. BOSS CRANKY, YELL AT HULK. END OF DAY, HULK GO HOME, TIRED, WORN OUT, FEELING MISERABLE. HULK GET TO END OF ROPE ONE DAY, SMASHED BUILDING HULK WORKED IN. HULK GOT FIRED. HAD TO FIND NEW JOB. HIRING DIFFICULT. APPARENTLY HULK NOT GOOD HIRING MATERIAL… SERIOUS BLOW TO HULK’S ESTEEM.
creepybaldguy asked:
Hulk, what will you do with with Iron man`s armor when you`re done with him? I would use it as a toilet.
HULK THINK IT MAKE NICE MODERN ART. PUT IT IN CORNER. COMPANY COMES OVER, ASK ABOUT IT, I CAN SAY, THAT IDIOT SHOT HULK INTO SPACE. THEN STARK SERVE CRACKERS AND CHEESE.
Chase asked:
So, uh, when you eat bad Chinese food, Hulkster, how many rolls of toilet paper; and toilets, for that matter; do you go through?
Does it burn, even for you?
HULK HAD BAD CHINESE FOOD ONCE. HULK HAD BAD WEEK THAT NIGHT. LIKE HUMAN TORCH CRAWL UP HULK’S BUTT. HULK NEVER GO BACK. HULK CAN’T GO BACK.
Vanilla Blue asked:
Hulk,
Baldwin is still a badass, right?
ONE LOOK IN THOSE COLD FLINTY EYES AND HULK NEVER WANT HIM CALL HULK RUDE LITTLE PIG. HULK PEE SELF. AND HULK NOT PEE SELF FOR ANYBODY.
ricster9 asked:
Hey Hulky, I’ve noticed you’ve been a bit lonely recently, if you want some nighttime company, a massage etc let me know, im a top by the way (If that makes a difference).
… HULK THINK OFFER NICE, BUT HULK BEEN… UHH… REALLY BUSY LATELY. HULK MAY BE TAKING VACATION SOON, ANYWAY. HULK PROMISE TO LOOK YOU UP WHEN HULK GETS BACK. HULK NOT LYING AT ALL!!
Simun asked:
do you think you could smash through a wall better than the Kool Aid man?
OH YEAH!!
Calbretto asked:
Dear Hulk,
Is it true that whoever smelled it dealt it?
HULK LOST HIS SENSE OF SMELL IN LAST FIGHT WITH ABOMINATION. HIS NAME NOT ONLY BECAUSE OF HIS APPEARANCE.
Heli88 asked:
Dear Hulk,
How about some advice for our lovelorn Fwooshers?
CAN’T FORCE THINGS!!
What is a good place to meet new people for fun, friendship, and possibly more?
TRY LOCAL SUPERMARKET. ASK TO SQUEEZE MELONS!!
What is your best pick-up line?
HULK ALWAYS GET LUCKY WITH "WANT TO SMASH!!"
Are you worried about meeting Ms. Right For Hulk?
HULK ONLY CONCERNED WITH MEETING MS. RIGHT NOW!!! HULK WHAT THEY CALL PLAYA. HULK LIKE TO PLAY FIELD. HULK WORK IT.
… HULK DROWNING IN VAT OF LIES…
Samuron asked:
who is Ronin?
HULK NOT SURPRISED IF NEXT TIME RONIN TAKE MASK OFF HULK UNDER THERE. IF LAST RONIN FEMALE IN MALE SUIT THIS RONIN BE SEVEN FOOT THOUSAND POUND HULK IN MAN SUIT.
GRANDPA asked:
is your jock strap bright green?
HULK NOT NEED JOCK!! HULK LET THEM SWING FREE!!
Heli88 asked:
More to the point: boxers or briefs?
HULK THINK BOXING MATCH WITH HULK BE BRIEF!!
TFitz asked:
Have you ever had blue balls?
HULK FELL IN VAT OF BLUE PAINT WHEN FOUGHT ROCK GUY AT FACTORY, IF THAT WHAT YOU MEAN.
SYNNER asked:
HULK!
Why does Wolverine have a female clone and you don’t? And if you were to bump uglies would that be incest or self gratification?
HULK WANT TO KNOW HOW HAIRY RUNT APPEAR IN EVERY COMIC EVERY MONTH. HULK APPEAR IN MAYBE TWO AND HULK FEEL TIRED. HULK THINK RUNT HAS TO HAVE CLONES FOR THAT. ONLY ANSWER. AND HULK THINK CLONE OF HULK WOULD BE DISTURBING. HULK REALLY JUST WANT SHE-HULK.
… DID HULK SAY THAT OUT LOUD?
panther10 asked:
Dear hulk,
pronounce the phrase "Oootie mootie pootsie scabbo wabbo babbo scabbo" while holding your tounge.
HULK GOT BETTER IDEA. HULK PRONOUNCE IT WHILE HOLDING YOUR TONGUE. FIVE FEET FROM YOUR FACE. HAHA!! HULK GET LAST LAUGH!!
hellspawn asked:
Dear HULK,
How did you celebrate 4/20 @ 4:20?
HULK CAN’T TELL TIME.
meatloaf of darkness asked:
Dear hulk,
You have a cheeseburger and a hotdog infront of you, if you can only use one condiment infront of you, which one will you use? The condiments are ketchup, butter, mustard, mayonaisse, relish, jelly, peanut butter, and coconut flavor icing.
WHO SAY HULK ONLY HAVE ONE? HULK USE THEM ALL. NOBODY TELL HULK HE ONLY HAVE ONE CONDIMENT. HULK USE ALL CONDIMENTS IF HULK WANTS TO. HULK HUNGRY NOW…
morpheuzx asked:
Dear Hulkster,
Whos stronger you or superman?
HULK NOT TAKE ANYONE SERIOUSLY THAT WEARS A CAPE.
thx3188 asked:
Hulk, what’s the farthest you have ever jumped?
HULK ONCE JUMPED FROM USA TO CANADA ON SINGLE JUMP. HOWEVER, HULK ON BORDER WHEN HE JUMPED, SO…
Also, have you ever landed in a pile of dog poo?
DOG POO, NO, DOG POUND, YES. NOT END WELL FOR DOGGIES.
panther10 asked:
Dear Hulk,
Does sally really sell seashells down by the seashore on sundays after service with a smile, or is it all a load of bull?
HULK HEARD SALLY A BIT OF A SLUT. HULK NOT TRUST WORD SHE SAYS.
Simun asked:
do you trim or is it like a jungle down there?
HULK CAN’T SEE FOREST FOR TREE
Chibikasai asked:
Hey Hulk…
When it comes to the ladies, do you prefer more T, or more A? Inquiring minds.
HULK LIKE T AND A EQUALLY. HULK FOND OF ENTIRE ALPHABET. EXCEPT FOR Q. HULK HATE Q. GET STUCK WITH Q WHEN HULK PLAY SCRABBLE, NEVER CAN GET A U WHEN HULK NEEDS IT. TEN POINT DEDUCTION. MAKE HULK ANGRY!!!
Scumgrief asked:
So, which is better, Metallica or Megadeth?
THE BAND THAT DIDN’T RELEASE ST. ANGER.
Chase asked;
Why does Fin Fang Foom wear shorts? More pressingly, though, were you ever stuffed into his shorts? If so, did you catch a glance at Nessie?
HULK STUFFED INTO FOOM’S SHORTS ONCE. HULK HORRIFIED. FOOM GOT DONGLE SIZE OF HULK. HULK THINK IT LOOKED AT HIM. HULK CAN’T LOOK AT FOOM AGAIN.
GRANDPA asked:
mister hulk
what do you wear when you go to bed at night??
BETTY!
Heli88 asked:
Dear Hulk,
Who or what can defeat you? My guess is nothing, because you’re the strongest one there is, but some people have been wondering.
NOBODY CAN DEFEAT HULK!!! HOWEVER… HULK THINK EVERYONE UNDERESTIMATE POWER PACK.
Kirk asked:
Will juggernauts helmet fit your noggin ?
HULK WORE IT ONCE, TO A PARTY. GOT A LOT OF COMPLIMENTS. BUT THERE WAS… INCIDENT. HULK NEED TO BUY NEW ONE. HULK WRITE LETTER OF APOLOGY.
SammaeL asked:
Hulk,
IF you could swap out your two arch enemies (Leader and A-Bomb) for two arch enemies of another hero,who would they be?
HULK THINK HULK LIKE TO SWAP FOR CAPTAIN AMERICA’S ENEMIES. WHICH RIGHT NOW SEEM TO BE BULLET AND INABILITY TO DUCK. HULK LAUGH IN FACE!!
GRANDPA asked:
MISTER HULK
Do you find other people GREEN with envy
GREEN HULK’S TRADEMARK. OTHERS NEED TO GET OWN COLOR.
panther10 asked:
Dear Hulk,
Remember that time you wore bunny slippers? What the Hell were you thinking?!?
HULK LIKE COMFORT. ALTHOUGH NEXT TIME HULK KILL BUNNY BEFORE TRYING HIM ON.
venom asked:
did it hurt when deadpool impaled you with a street sign?
HULK WANTED DEADPOOL TO STOP, BUT SIGN ONLY WENT ONE WAY.
simmo asked:
Hulk,
Do people read the thread, or just your answers on the ezine…wait, do you even know what an ezine is?
HULK KNOW WHAT EZINE IS. IT… UH… THAT THING… THAT… UHH… WITH THE… NOISES… AND… INTERWEB… UHH… HULK GETTING CALL, HULK GOTTA GO.
RAAAAARGH, HULK DONE!!!