Cold Slither was an episode of the old Sunbow G.I. Joe series and if you happened to like that one, you are in luck because Hasbro and Super7 have opened the Cold Slither floodgates this summer with G.I. Joe Classified and O-Ring figures, a new album, music videos, live performances, and an upcoming comic book. I’ve partaken in a good chunk of that stuff, but today we’re going to take a look at the Classified SDCC “Exclusive” Cold Slither set!
The box is an impressive piece of artwork, designed to look like a theater in Cobra company town Springfield. The artwork features lots of fun little Dreadnok references like their symbols, bikes, weapons, tattoos, and even a few Dreadnoks (Zarana working the ticket booth, Yobbo the Monkey, and Monkeywrench). I do love seeing Jem and the Misfits reference in the posters here too. The interior opens up to show the band playing their tune in three window boxes. The interior of those windows has a cobra-themed stage backdrop straight out of the episode. There’s even little set lists on the “floor” of the box. I think they would display nicely inside of the box for carded collectors, but I’ve also seen a fan cut up the poster elements and the big speaker photos on the box for use as part of a Cold Slither backdrop.
The set consists of Zartan and the three main Dreadnoks in Cold Slither disguise, two guitars, a keytar, a drum kit, 5 straps for the guitars, and sticks for the drum. The kit itself is really impressive and is seven pieces including the bass drum with two smaller drums attached above it, a floor tom, a snare drum, a separate pedal for the bass drum, a stool, and two cymbals. Buzzer fits perfectly on the stool and can hold the sticks securely. You can configure the drums how you like, so I set mine up how I remember drummers doing it when I was in bands. I like that they went as far as to put little pedal for the smaller cymbal and they sculpted the tiny little screw twists where you adjust the height of the stands. It’s a pretty impressive piece that would really only be improved by a more shiny silver metallic paint job. A riser wouldn’t go amiss either, but that’s really easy to make for yourself to fit your display. I cut two pieces of insulation foam and glued them together for mine.
The instruments are lovely, all far more detailed than what is used on the show. I do not mind the lack of complete fidelity to the show instruments because to be honest, they looked extremely wonky there. These have solid paint jobs with metallic paint for the strings and bright designs that feel era appropriate. The straps are a little thicker and clunkier than I’d like, but they are functional. I’m not sure the reason for including two extra straps, but I’ll take them. It is interesting that they chose the keytar over the stand up keyboard from the show, but I do love a keytar, so I’ll allow it. Torch gets the Keytar, but I suppose it could go to Ripper as well since they swap instruments between scenes on the show. Not that it matters since they just lip-synching anyway!
Sculpting is really good with expressive faces for the group and appropriately lean bodies for their glam rock spandex costumes. They all re-use the same new legs and three figures (Zartan, Ripper, and Buzzer) re-use the Quick Kick upper body and arms. This makes them a little more thin than their original classified figures, but works for me mostly. Different overlays complete the character looks and the boots are all the same basic sculpt with some overlays to make Buzzer’s fringe and Ripper’s blue scarves.
Torch looks to me like he uses the Crimson Twins torso and arms, so he’s a little closer to his original build. The pistol grip hands work surprisingly well for guitar and drums and the the slight splay to the crimson twin hands kind of works for keyboards. Of course some dedicated pick holding and fretting hands would have been nice, but it’s not the downside I thought it would be.
The faces match the original characters pretty well, though it’s hard to see Classified Ripper in his Cold Slither disguise since he’s now got huge hair instead of a mohawk. He kinda makes me think of wrestler Seth Rollins more than anything. Zartan looks like the same face as usual with new hair, so it might have been nice to get him singing.
Articulation is G.I. Joe Classified standard, though the ball joint in the torso works better here than it usually does. Ripper and Zartan’s head movement is a little limited by the long hair.
You can swap these heads with the original Dreadnok heads to varying degrees of success. Zartan just does not work at all because the original has a huge ball joint. Torch works somewhat, but the new head sits low on the old body and the old head sits high on the new one. Buzzer is similarly bobble-headed on the old body. Ripper probably works best out of the group.
Paint is solid, if not flashy, pretty typical with G.I. Joe Classified. The highlight here being the nice face prints. I especially like Zartan’s huge eye paint and lizardy green eyes.
Overall, I’d say this is a really nice set. The instruments are really cool, though a couple more unique accessories like guitar pick holding hands, a singing portrait for Zartan, or a riser for the drum kit would have made this set (and Zartan) sing. The main thing I’m really missing would be a microphone and stand for Zartan. This would have been a great opportunity to get us some grape soda and chocolate donut accessories too. The price tag of $124.99 was less than I was dreading with the usual SDCC packaging markup, but when you think about it, these guys are pretty lightly accessorized for Classified figures so it’s not exactly a bargain with four figures usually being $25.00 each. I don’t know if the very impressive drum kit is $25.00 worth of impressive, but the packaging does factor into the cost too, so I don’t feel bad about this one. It was also just a lot of fun messing with these figures. The Cold Slither episode is minor enough that I feel like this is a great choice for an exclusive. It never sold out at the show, though I understand that getting orders in afterward was a pain. It is up now for pre-order on Pulse with a September release date if you want one.
