In the grand scheme of things, I’m a fairly recent convert to The Prisoner, despite the fact that I watched it for the first time about six years ago. But for a show that debuted in 1967, I think that probably qualifies me to be a new fan because debates and conversations have been raging about the mercurial, surreal, and riddle-laden show for decades. It has infiltrated pop culture in various ways, from Iron Maiden songs to Simpsons episodes, but the one thing it’s truly missing is an action figure line.
The Prisoner tells the story of Number 6 (portrayed by Patrick McGoohan), a one time spy who quits his job and is subsequently gassed and kidnapped, waking on a secluded village from which there is no escape, despite his best efforts. Over the course of 17 episodes, Number 6 defies authority, attempts escape constantly, and all the while tries to figure out the secrets behind his captors. The face of his captivity is a rotating “Number 2,” who is different in almost every show, whose duty it is to crack Number 6 and find out why he quit. Number 2 answers to — no, don’t guess ahead — Number 1, who remains unseen and unknown, at least until the baffling end.
It is, in a word, fascinating. There have been two shows that have wrapped me up in a dream-like sense of otherness while watching the show: The Prisoner and Twin Peaks. While some would say Twin Peaks went on too long (I don’t agree with them, but it has been said), The Prisoner came and went in a burst of creativity and left behind a legacy of questions.
Questions, but no toys.
I can understand it, in a way. It’s a cerebral show, and even though there’s action, it’s minimal, so as a whole it doesn’t seem like it would lend itself to toys. But that doesn’t matter. I don’t need a huge toy line because there’s not a huge cast like there is in something like Game of Thrones. Get in, give me a handful of important figures, and I’ll be as perky as a peach in a pie. Or something.
Number 6 is, of course, a necessity. There are three versions I’d like, but if I were only able to get a single version, It would of course have to be 6 in his standard village wear, hat included. It’s a bit of a pipe dream to get a Hot Toys figure of this version because I’d be assured to get a host of accessories and alternate hands, maybe an alternate head so I could have the option of trademark smirk or sneer. But in lieu of that dream, a regular figure would do just nicely.
If we were able to get more than one version, I’d like a dressed up evening wear version, and, of course, a Wild West version for when Number 6 believed himself to be a western gunslinger. I know, but it makes sense if you watch it. There’s not enough Wild West figures as it is, so that would be a cool figure on its own.
There are several options for a Number 2 figure, and in a perfect world with a perfect toy line I’d like them all, but, of course, there is one Number 2 who made several appearances, including the tour de force (an overused term but true) final two episodes where Numbers 6 and 2 go head-to-head in a battle of stamina, endurance, wits, stubbornness, and determination that is one of the most fascinating mental battles ever. I have plenty of runners-up. But if I had to make a choice, it would be be Leo McKern’s Number 2 that I’d choose.
Another essential figure would be either or both characters portrayed by Alexis Kanner, who showed up twice: once in the Western episode, but again in the final episode playing a counterculture anarchist whose constant singing of “Dem Bones” provided a thematic and manic relevance to the judge-and-jury proceedings against a perfectly calm Number 6.
I know none of this is making any sense to you if you haven’t seen the show, I’m sure, so hopefully the first thing you will do is marathon through it after reading this. It’s only 17 hours!
Finally, and probably the second most important character besides Number 6 himself, is The Butler, as portrayed by 4 foot 3 inch Angelo Muscat. Without a single line in the 14 episodes he appeared in, The Butler was an enigmatic and omnipresent force who never wavered from duty, was unfailingly polite, and provided yet another wordless mystery to be solved. His role was so constant as he tended to the various Number 2’s needs or was seen walking around the Village with his umbrella that it was heavily theorized that he was actually Number 1, until the final episode made it all even more mind-boggling.
I’d want a Rover, but I can buy a balloon for that creepy thing because I have no idea how that could be done as an accessory.
That’s all I need: a skeleton line. If I got a core cast of characters from this show, I’d be happy. I have literally no hope of it ever happening, but I’ve been hopeless before and fortune has shifted, so maybe this has a shot.
By hook or by crook, it just might.
