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The Hammer, The Sickle, The Gun Hand

What’s that you ask? “Why should I vote for KGBeast in my top ten most wanted figures for the DC Universe classics line?” Well I’m glad you asked. Now sit back while I tell you why this guy should get immortalized in six inch plastic form.
You see KGBeast whose real name is Anatoli Knyazev, comes from a time where we as Americans used to pee our pants thinking about the evil Soviet Union and their plans for world domination. We were in constant fear because as far as we knew, all the Soviet Union wanted was to destroy us and take away our freedom and way of life. They wanted to see our nation crumble into a third world country or even worse just blow us off the face of the Earth! That way the Soviet Union could spread their evil and dangerous views and beliefs all over the world.
Well as it turns out, not so much. They really were just as scared of us as we were of them. Who knew? Ah the 80’s. Good times indeed.
Now you see, KGBeast on the other hand did want all that. He was bent on bringing down the American way of life no matter what. He saw the United States and the Soviet Union inching towards peace and he wanted no part of that. “Nyet”! To that idea, he screamed into the cold Russian night. After all he had spent his entire life training to destroy the United States, and no way in hell was he going to stand there and watch his beloved country become weak like the United States.
“Who was he?”, you ask. Well, Anatoli Knyazev was a former assassin for the KGB who went rogue when he decided that his country couldn’t do what was needed to be done. He came to America hellbent on killing members of the United States’ Strategic Defense Initiative, nicknamed the “Star Wars” program, in the hope of putting an end to it thus giving the U.S.S.R. the chance to become the one and only super power in the world.
He was actually pretty successful at it too killing seven of his nine targets before finally being stopped by Batman and Russian officials who came over to help out. He managed to kill some of the hardest to kill, most protected members of the project and almost took out then President Ronald Reagan while he was here. Now why all these key govt officials were in Gotham I have no clue, but it was the 80’s so important details like that weren’t needed. Anyways, KGBeast fought Batman to a stand still during their first big throwdown, and was one of the very few villains that had Batman actually frightened a bit. Is that not worthy by itself to earn enough coolness points to get a figure?
If not, think about that this guy when finally cornered and trapped by Batman, would rather chop off his own hand than be captured and fail his mission:
Now, maybe cutting the rope would’ve been a better option……….but, to become even more of a badass KGBeast shoved an automatic gun on his nubby stump to add even more firepower to his already dangerous arsenal:
A guy who fought Batman to a standstill and has a gun hand! How cool is that? His figure would be armed to the teeth, built like a tank, with a gun hand! A GUN HAND! Do you see why we need this guy yet? Now I know the costume is a bit… um… too fetishy kinda? I mean there are alot of zippers and skin showing, but in recent re-designs he’s lost the amount of skin revealing and has donned a more fearsome and practical look.
I have no doubts that 4 Horsemen could settle on a look that would be representative of all his communist baddassery.
Still not convinced? Well how about that even before it became cool to rise from the dead with all of this Blackest Night shenanigans, KGBeast was brought back from the dead to kill Nightwing. Granted, that didn’t work out so well for our Russian hero so he was returned to his grave sadly.
Good news though! KGBeast has jumped into the latest craze of coming back from the dead and this time he is now a Black Lantern set to wreak havoc on do gooders and once again become the evil threat he was born to be!
Now, I will grant you that ever since his first appearance KGBeast has sadly become more of a joke villain with badly written recent appearances and even a very lame-o death at the hands of one of White Shark’s goons. I however, remember him much more fondly. I remember when he first appeared in Batman 417 and was singlehandedly taking out members of the US government while racking up a huge body count. Doing evil things like poisoning a restaurant full of people just to get to one target who was eating there, or even using a school bus full of children to achieve his goals.
All this while wearing a zipper head mask, thigh high leather boots, and a very questionable choice in the pants department. Or a distinct lack thereof.
The KGBeast I remember was scary, relentless, ruthless, and a villain that Batman truly feared. A villain that even after Batman had gouged out one of his eyes and made him lose a hand in battle, would still rather trap and lock away in a bomb shelter than fight. That’s the KGBeast I remember. The KGBeast I remember is the one who came to Gotham wreaking havoc while striking fear into all capitalist pigs as he waged war against Batman and the United States in his now infamous “Ten Nights of the Beast”.
Vladimir Putin definitely remembers too. Just look at that disgusted look he gives at the mere sight of a Bat symbol:

414px-Hammer_and_sickle.svgWhat’s that you ask? “Why should I vote for KGBeast in my top ten most wanted figures for the DC Universe classics line?” Well I’m glad you asked. Now sit back while I tell you why this guy should get immortalized in six inch plastic form.

You see KGBeast whose real name is Anatoli Knyazev, comes from a time where we as Americans used to pee our pants thinking about the evil Soviet Union and their plans for world domination. We were in constant fear because as far as we knew, all the Soviet Union wanted was to destroy us and take away our freedom and way of life. They wanted to see our nation crumble into a third world country or even worse just blow us off the face of the Earth! That way the Soviet Union could spread their evil and dangerous views and beliefs all over the world.

Well as it turns out, not so much. They really were just as scared of us as we were of them. Who knew? Ah the 80’s. Good times indeed.

Now you see, KGBeast on the other hand did want all that. He was bent on bringing down the American way of life no matter what. He saw the United States and the Soviet Union inching towards peace and he wanted no part of that. “Nyet”! To that idea, he screamed into the cold Russian night. After all he had spent his entire life training to destroy the United States, and no way in hell was he going to stand there and watch his beloved country become weak like the United States.

“Who was he?”, you ask. Well, Anatoli Knyazev was a former assassin for the KGB who went rogue when he decided that his country couldn’t do what was needed to be done. He came to America hellbent on killing members of the United States’ Strategic Defense Initiative, nicknamed the “Star Wars” program, in the hope of putting an end to it thus giving the U.S.S.R. the chance to become the one and only super power in the world.

KGBeast01

He was actually pretty successful at it too killing seven of his nine targets before finally being stopped by Batman and Russian officials who came over to help out. He managed to kill some of the hardest to kill, most protected members of the project and almost took out then President Ronald Reagan while he was here. Now why all these key govt officials were in Gotham I have no clue, but it was the 80’s so important details like that weren’t needed. Anyways, KGBeast fought Batman to a stand still during their first big throwdown, and was one of the very few villains that had Batman actually frightened a bit. Is that not worthy by itself to earn enough coolness points to get a figure?

If not, think about that this guy when finally cornered and trapped by Batman, would rather chop off his own hand than be captured and fail his mission:

KGBeast07

Now, maybe cutting the rope would’ve been a better option……….but, to become even more of a badass KGBeast shoved an automatic gun on his nubby stump to add even more firepower to his already dangerous arsenal:

KGBeast

A guy who fought Batman to a standstill and has a gun hand! How cool is that? His figure would be armed to the teeth, built like a tank, with a gun hand! A GUN HAND! Do you see why we need this guy yet? Now I know the costume is a bit… um… too fetishy kinda? I mean there are alot of zippers and skin showing, but in recent re-designs he’s lost the amount of skin revealing and has donned a more fearsome and practical look.

1

I have no doubts that 4 Horsemen could settle on a look that would be representative of all his communist baddassery.

Still not convinced? Well how about that even before it became cool to rise from the dead with all of this Blackest Night shenanigans, KGBeast was brought back from the dead to kill Nightwing. Granted, that didn’t work out so well for our Russian hero so he was returned to his grave sadly.

Good news though! KGBeast has jumped into the latest craze of coming back from the dead and this time he is now a Black Lantern set to wreak havoc on do gooders and once again become the evil threat he was born to be!

921830-black_lantern_kgbeast_large

Now, I will grant you that ever since his first appearance KGBeast has sadly become more of a joke villain with badly written recent appearances and even a very lame-o death at the hands of one of White Shark’s goons. I however, remember him much more fondly. I remember when he first appeared in Batman 417 and was singlehandedly taking out members of the US government while racking up a huge body count. Doing evil things like poisoning a restaurant full of people just to get to one target who was eating there, or even using a school bus full of children to achieve his goals.

All this while wearing a zipper head mask, thigh high leather boots, and a very questionable choice in the pants department. Or a distinct lack thereof.

The KGBeast I remember was scary, relentless, ruthless, and a villain that Batman truly feared. A villain that even after Batman had gouged out one of his eyes and made him lose a hand in battle, would still rather trap and lock away in a bomb shelter than fight. That’s the KGBeast I remember. The KGBeast I remember is the one who came to Gotham wreaking havoc while striking fear into all capitalist pigs as he waged war against Batman and the United States in his now infamous “Ten Nights of the Beast”.

Vladimir Putin definitely remembers too. Just look at that disgusted look he gives at the mere sight of a Bat symbol:

RUSSIA-INTELLIGENCE-SERVICE-PUTIN-IVANOV

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1 thought on “The Hammer, The Sickle, The Gun Hand

  1. Let’s hope this figure gets a more modern look when released. I don’t want to see the brief-wearing classic version with that much skin exposed. Cyborg was enough for me.

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