REALLY!!
Simun asked:
I just got called for jury duty, first time ever. I know it sucks. What’s the easiest way to get out of it?
HULK HAD JURY DUTY ONCE. HULK TOLD MAN IN DRESS HULK HATED EVERYONE, AND THOUGHT EVERYONE GUILTY. HULK THEN TOLD DRESSMAN HE WAS GUILTY. AND OUT OF ORDER. IT SOMETHING HULK HEARD ON TV. HULK THEN TOOK JUDGE’S HAMMER AND SMASHED DRESSMAN’S FACE. HULK NEVER HAD JURY DUTY AGAIN. HULK SUGGEST TRYING THIS.
hellspawn asked:
Dear HULK,
Why is it that change is inevitable, except from a vending machine?
RAAARGH, HULK ONLY WANTED KIT-KAT, WHY VENDING MACHINE NOT GIVE HULK KIT KAT. RAAAARGH, BREAK HULK PIECE OF THAT KIT KAT BAR!!!
HULK ONCE FOUND CHANGE IN A SOFA. IT NOT EVEN HULK’S SOFA. IT SOFA OF FRIEND. BUT HULK KEPT QUARTER. CAUSE FRIEND OWE HULK TWENTY BUCKS. NOW OWE HULK…QUARTER LESS.
TFitz asked:
Hulk, I just wanted you to know that I find your answers very insightful, and a great read. You truly are one of the
smartest people I know.
Dumb Ass.
HULK WAS HAPPY. NOW HULK SAD. AND HULK KIND OF ANGRY. AND…HUNGRY, ALSO. HULK NEED FOOD. THEN HULK GONNA FIND TFITZ AND SMASH HIM. HULK JUST NEED AN ADDRESS. PLEASE SEND ADDRESS TO ASK HULK. HULK BE THERE TO SMASH BETWEEN HOURS OF 8 AM AND 5 PM. IF NOT AT HOME WHEN HULK ARRIVE, HULK POOP ON YOUR PORCH. HULK THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION!!
AF asked:
Hulk —
You aren’t colorblind. You just wanted something to compliment the green, didn’t you?
IF BY COMPLIMENT THE GREEN YOU MEAN PEE IN THE YARD…THEN YES HULK COMPLIMENT THE GREEN ALL THE TIME!
The Iron Man movie is going to rock. Are you planning on seeing it when it lands in theatres? What about your new movie? Edward Norton cast as Bruce Banner will be miles better than Eric Bana, don’t you think?
HULK ALREADY GOT INVITATION TO IRON MAN MOVIE PREMIER. STARK WROTE "NEENER NEENER MY MOVIE BETTER THAN YOURS." HULK THINK HULK’S NEW MOVIE GOING TO BE…BETTER THAN ELEKTRA’S MOVIE. BUT HULK CAN’T MAKE UP HULK’S MIND ABOUT NORTON. ON ONE HAND, HULK THINK HE OKAY, BUT ON OTHER HAND, HULK ALWAYS WANT TO TELL NORTON TO STOP HITTING HIMSELF WHEN HULK WATCH HIM IN THAT ONE MOVIE WHERE NORTON HITS SELF. AND THAT CONFUSE HULK. HULK IS TYLER DURDEN NOW? HULK CONFUSED ON MANY LEVELS.
chuck20 asked:
hulk, why is one so much bigger than the other?
BECAUSE HULK WAS HIT IN THE LEFT ONE WHEN HE KID AND IT SWELLED.
and can you reccomend a good worm removal creme?
IT CALLED A SHOWER. TRY IT ONCE IN WHILE.
AlphaPrime asked:
Hulk, which is your all time favorite looking IM armor? now don’t be mean, seriously, which one do you think looks the coolest?
HULK LIKE SILVER CENTURION ARMOR. HULK THINK IT PIMPED OUT. IN FACT, HULK HAD ONE CUSTOM BUILT FOR HULK TO WEAR WHEN HULK AT PARTIES. HULK STILL NOT PAID FOR IT THOUGH. SUCK IT STARK.
Also sorry i didn’t ask anything last week, thought i’d take a break from asking you something every once in a while, in fact, why don’t you take a break sometime and let one of your guests take over for a week or something, surly even the great Hulk needs a break from time to time.
HULK CAN’T TAKE BREAK, CAUSE HULK KNOWS THEY JUST WAITING FOR HULK TO SLIP UP SO THEY CAN FIRE HULK AND BRING IN HOWARD THE DUCK TO TAKE OVER HULK’S COLUMN. HE APPARENTLY WILL WORK FOR CHEAPER PAY, EVEN THOUGH HULK’S PAY IS BARELY ENOUGH TO COVER HULK’S PARKING EXPENSES. STRANGE THAT HULK NOT HAVE CAR, THOUGH…
simmo asked:
Hulk,
You’re being chased by everyone all the time…are the IRS after you as well? Cause your taxes could pay for a small child to get free ice-cream for a week.
HULK NOT PAY TAXES. HULK EARNED HULK’S MONEY FOR HULKSELF, NOT FOR…SOME OTHER GUY. AND THAT KID NEVER LEARN CHARACTER IF HE PAMPERED WITH ICE CREAM. WHEN HULK KID HULK WALKED UPHILL TEN MILES BOTH WAYS TO PAY WEEK’S ALLOWANCE FOR ICE CREAM CONE WHILE GETTING HIT WITH A BROOM. HULK LIVED IN ROUGH NEIGHBORHOOD. BUT IT MADE HULK WHAT HULK IS TODAY. A BIG ANGRY GREEN MAN. SO THINK ABOUT THAT A WHILE, KID WITHOUT CONE. THINK ABOUT THAT LONG TIME.
johnny_b asked:
Hulk
Who would win between the Man without a Name, the T-800 model 101, Robocop, Indiana Jones and Solid Snake ?
HULK SAY ROBOCOP, IF HE HAD SNAZZY GUN THAT BLOWS THINGS UP. UNLESS MAN WITH NO NAME TAKE GUN AWAY FROM HIM. SO HULK SAY EASTWOOD WIN. CAUSE HE JUST BAD BAD MAN.
Kirk asked:
do you smoke weed ?
NO, HULK SPRITZ THEM EVERY WEEK WITH THAT SPRAY THAT SMELLS. THEY GROW BACK EVENTUALLY, BUT IT TAKES A WHILE.
UNLESS THAT NOT WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT. IF YOU TALKING ABOUT OTHER THING…HULK…COMPLIMENT THE GREEN SOMETIMES.
RAARGH AGAIN!