HULK HERE. HULK LIKE TO INTRODUCE HANK MCCOY.
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS BEAST. RAAARGH,
HULK NOT ONLY BEAST NOW.
Greetings and salutations, Hulk.
RAAARGH! SALAMI STATION TO YOU TOO! LET’S GET TO THE QUESTIONS!
RockSteady asked:
Hulk which do you prefer Gwen Stefani or Fergie?
RAAARGH! HULK PRETTY SURE DUCHESS OF WALES NOT UP FOR TANGO WITH HULK! UNLESS YOU MEAN SINGER, IN WHICH CASE…HULK DONE SOME PRETTY BIZARRE THINGS IN HULK’S LIFE, BUT HULK NEVER DONE SOMETHING THAT LOOK LIKE GOT FACE FULL OF GAMMA RAYS! HULK GO FOR SQUEAKY VOICE ANNOYING SINGER OVER OTHER THING!
I’m afraid that the alleged pulchritude is also lost on me as well, friend.
RAAARGH! ARE YOU AGREEING WITH HULK? HULK CAN’T TELL!
Yes.
OKAY THEN!
Simun asked:
Who was your role model growing up, and why was it John Holmes?
WHEN HULK LIE ON BACK, LOOK LIKE SOMEBODY PLANTED FLAG IN HULK! RAARGH, IT NEVER HURT TO DREAM, KIDS!
Oh my Stars and Garters!
HULK LOOK LIKE WASHINGTON MONUMENT!
simmo asked:
Did you go to SDCC, looking for Stark?
HULK SMASHED FIFTEEN GUYS IN ARMOR. SIXTEEN, IF COUNT THAT STORMTROOPER. BUT NONE OF THEM STARK. HULK NEEDS TO WRITE LETTER OF APOLOGY NOW. BUT ON PLUS SIDE, HULK GOT EXCLUSIVE STAN LEE FIGURE. NOT TOY, THOUGH. HULK GOT REAL STAN LEE TIED UP IN CLOSET. FIGURE HULK SELL HIM ON E-BAY.
You know, Hulk, I don’t believe I understand this ephemeral "rivalry" that you and our erstwhile Avenging companion have gestating. Care to illuminate me on it’s exact nature and origins??
RAAARGH HULK PRETTY SURE YOU NOT SPEAKING ENGLISH!!!
Discogod asked:
Hulkster,
You’re green. I presume you’re illegal. There’s something else that’s green and illegal, and is just super to smoke*. I’ve not tried smoking Hulk, so I can’t make that comparison. Anywhoo, you ever smoked th’weed? I figure it might make you a little less angry. Maybe you could get Doc Samson to hook you up, he looks like a damn hippy with that long hair.
*not really, kids
HULK NEVER SMOKED DOPE. HULK JUST SAY NO. HULK ONLY SMOKE LEAVES COME IN PLASTIC BAG.
Umm…Hulk, I believe that is what the gentleman is referring to.
HULK NOT UNDERSTAND. GUY SAID IT WAS HERB. HULK ALSO PUT IT ON HIS SALAD.
Ummm…you’re quite perspicacious, Hulk.
HULK NOT SWEATING! HULK GOT ANTI-PERSPIRANT!
Chase asked:
Yo Hulk,
Don’t you just hate it when people add the suffix "-izzle" to words? It makes me want to smash. Arrgh!
HULK WONDER WHAT WRONG WITH YOUTH OF TODAY. HULK HEARD SOME KID SAY SHIZZLE. HULK NOT KNOW WHAT SHIZZLE IS. HULK LOOKED IT UP IN DICTIONARY, STILL NO HELP. SO HULK WANDER AROUND AIMLESSLY, WRACKING HULK’S BRAIN, TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT SHIZZLE MEANT. FINALLY, HULK FIGURED IT OUT. HULK REMEMBER IT THAT THING USED TO STIR CREAM INTO COFFEE. A SHIZZLE STICK.
I believe you are referring to a "swizzle" stick, Hulk. It is quite a common error.
RAAARGH! YOUR FUR IS so SOFT! DO YOU USE CONDITIONER!
meatloaf of darkness asked:
Dearizzle my hulkizzle,
Do you have a favorite scrubs episode?
HULK LIKE THAT ONE WHERE THE BROTHER IS DEAD AND PERRY TALKING TO HIM WHOLE SHOW, THEN IT REVEALED, AUDIENCE GETS IT, MAJOR BUMMER. HULK GET LUMP IN THROAT JUST THINKING ABOUT IT.
I’m afraid I’ve never seen Scrubs. I don’t generally partake in televised entertainment, preferring instead to enrich my intellect by poring through some classic tome, ingesting wisdom in other ways.
HULK UNDERSTOOD NOT SINGLE WORD IN THAT SENTENCE. HULK SHOULD HAVE ASKED FOR TRANSLATOR!
Chase asked:
Dearest Hulk,
Can you please smash Meatloaf? Like, fork him, and gulp him down with peas and mashed potatoes, and stuff.
Ah, and Hulk, if you were a food, what would you be?
p.s. the loafster (guy before me) calls you "the green bean of mean"; i think he wants to marry you
HULK LEARNED LESSON LAST TIME! HULK NOT FORKING HIS FOOD AGAIN! JUST UNSANITARY!ALSO, HULK LIKE TO BE KUMQUAT. BECAUSE EVERY TIME HULK SAY WORD KUMQUAT, HULK GIGGLE!
I believe I’d like to be a Pluot. It’s mostly plum, but with a dash of apricot in it also. I believe its esoteric nature encapsulates me well enough.
HULK LIKE GRAPES!
simmo asked:
Hulk, you’re 45 years old. Are you having a mid-life crisis?
HULK GOT A LITTLE CONCERNED, AND FELT HULK NEEDED SOMETHING TO PEP UP HULK’S IMAGE. HULK BOUGHT MOTORCYCLE. HULK SAT ON IT ONCE, IT GOT LODGED IN HULK’S BIG GREEN BUTT. HULK HAD TO GO TO PROCTOLOGIST. IT TRUE. WHEN YOU TELL THEM WHAT YOU GOT UP THERE, THEY DON’T BELIEVE IT UNTIL THEY SEE IT. HULK HAD BETTER DAYS.
I rather shame-facedly must admit to dying my fur to get the grey out. HAHAHA! That’s a little joke. Because my fur used to be grey.
HULK NOT THINK IT JOKE IF JOKE HAVE TO BE EXPLAINED!
xAngelx asked:
Hey Hulk, ever thought of starting the biggest, strongest, greenest most fightingest religion ever?
I’d join.
HULK ALREADY DID! HULK SEND YOU LEAFLET FOR HULKIANITY IF YOU LEAVE ADDRESS AND PRE-TITHING FEE OF HALF YOUR YEARLY SALARY. HULK HAVE EXPENSES. YEAH, EXPENSES. HULK THINK YACHT VERY NECESSARY! YACHTS GOOD FOR HULK’S SOUL! EVERYONE JOIN HULKIANITY! MAKE HULK RICH! IT WORKED FOR HUBBARD!
Your proselytizing is quite unnecessary, Hulk.
HULK NAME NOT PRISCILLA!
sexyvonpoopy asked:
hey hulk
Have you ever used dried buttermilk when making pancakes. Its what makes them soooo good.
NOW YOU TRYING TO CONFUSE HULK! HOW CAN MILK BE DRY? MILK IS LIQUID. LIQUID CAN’T BE DRY. LIQUID MEANS WET. HULK SMART ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND THAT. WET CAN’T BE DRY. UNLESS…IT EXIST IN SOME ALTERNATE UNIVERSE. BUT IF WET IS DRY, THEN IS DRY WET? SO, IF HULK DRY SELF OFF WITH TOWEL, IS HULK REALLY WETTING HIMSELF? AND IF HULK WET HIMSELF, THEN SHOULDN’T HULK BE A LOT MORE EMBARRASSED THAN HE IS NOW?
Hulk, please, you’re going to give yourself a cranial infarction with all this unnecessary intellectual superciliousness.
HULK JUST WAITING FOR YOU TO SAY ONE THING HULK UNDERSTANDS!
Simun asked:
what would happen if a skrull mated with a brood?
SHAPE-SHIFTING TENTACLE RAPE! IT MOST AWESOME ANIME EVER!
HULK DONE. HULK GOT MAJOR HEADACHE. BEAST NOT SPEAK ENGLISH. HULK SHOULD HAVE READ WIKIPEDIA OR SOMETHING. HULK KNOW BETTER NEXT TIME!