Hey kids! Want some bite-sized thoughts on toys? Look no further. You can read one on the way to the bathroom. You can read two or three while the light is red (do not interweb and drive). Or you can read them all at once and then regret it afterwards, like this is an all-you-can-eat buffet.
10. Megatron is how much now?
So the recently announced Transformers Masterpiece Megatron V 2.0 — you know, the one that doesn’t have ridiculouly scrawny legs — is going to be $230 at BBTS. Now, that price is no doubt going to be a bit lower once it starts showing up at the import stores like Amiami and HLJ, but that is still a ridiculous price. Even if it’s only $200 before shipping costs elsewhere, is this the new ceiling for the slightly larger characters? When Fortress Maximus and Metroplex are cheaper than a Masterpiece figure, I’m starting to wonder just what kind of inflation rate is being assigned to the word “Masterpiece.”
I get that toys are expensive, and I’m not above paying high prices for good toys, but when your first reaction to a price is that somebody typed a “2” when they should have typed a “1,” then something’s screwy.
9. Damn you, Figuarts, you’re making me want Marvel movie figures.
Movie figures have always been a contentious thing when peppered into the Marvel Legends lines. The forum has never been of one mind about it. I’ve always fallen on the side that has never cared for them. I’ve purchased my fair share of them, either for the BAF part or because I bought the entire wave, but I’ve never been enthused about them. I like the comic versions better.
And then along comes Figuarts, and now I’m seriously contemplating every Marvel movie figure thet pump out. The way it happens is I say “Oh, well, Figuarts are super-cool and fun, so it would be kind of nice to have at least a Captain America and Iron man from Civil War.”
Time passes, and then I’m all, “Well, I do like that Tony Stark figure. Let’s get him.”
“Hey, that Black Panther figure looks nice. You like Black Panther, right? I bet he’ll be awesome to pose.”
And now I’m wanting a Vision and Winter Soldier and just shoot me in the head because I’ve started down this path. And the thing about my anti-movie-figure bias is that I know I buy movie figures. Star Wars, duh. And all the NECA things. But there was this mental block where they were movies first, so it was the source material. The Marvel stuff were comics first, so I naturally gravitated towards the comic stuff. I didn’t need celebrities cosplaying as Marvel characters.
But stupid Figuarts and their stupid sexy toys happened.
So yeah, I’ve got a little RDJ now.
8. You’re not cool if you’re not collecting Kinnikuman
Speaking of Figuarts, Kinnikuman is just the epitome of toyjoy. Psycho-articulated, wacky designs, wide variety — it’s probably the line that is killing it the most across the board, at least for me and my specifically unspecific tastes. I get a buzz out of every Figuart figure I open up nowadays — especially Star Wars — but Kinnikuman might be the only line that, when I get a shipment of several figures, I will fiddle with and fiddle with and then fiddle some more before I get to anything else. They’re probably more of an extreme underdog given the sheer amount of toylines out there, but more and more Kinnikuman figures continue getting announced so it must be doing well. With the recent announcement of Sunshine, they look to be digging into the more unusual designs, so I really can’t wait to see what else is next. My only wish is for the rollout to speed up. I need at least one a month.
7. Regarding Star Wars: the character’s importance in the movie is meaningless
With the recent onslaught of new Star Wars movies and new Star Wars figures to go along with them, I’ve read a lot of hesitance in buying characters before their on-screen importance is revealed. It’s off-handedly been referred to as the “Captain Phasma syndrome”. Off-handedly as in I don’t know if anybody is calling it that, but I’m calling it that, so you all owe me money if you use it from now on.
No, Captain Phasma did not light up the galaxy with her awesomeness. She walked around kind of niftily and said some stuff but otherwise there wasn’t a lot there. While it is a shame she didn’t get much to do based on the fact that the actress portraying her clearly has badass inscribed in her DNA … didn’t you kind of already make her cool? You made an assumption based on appearance. You built a myth for her based on her toy. So the movie let you down. Well … the movie is not the sum totality of her existence. Those badass awesome things that we collectively believed she did probably happened, they just happened before the movie started.
When I was a kid, so much of my Star Wars playtime was fueled by characters who literally had seconds of screentime. You think I’d have let Phasma’s few minutes of walking around nullify how much badassery she accomplished while not on-screen? Hell no.
We’re getting a lot of Star Wars movies, and a lot of toys. There will be other Phasmas. Don’t let the movies dictate the fun.
6. Are you into big robots?
I have never seen Mobile Suit Gundam. I’ve seen some of Gundam Wing, but I’ve never seen the original. I’m planning on fixing that at some point, but for now I only know the suits. Despite this, I’m fascinated by the Robot Spirits A.N.I.M.E. Line. The Robot spirits line has been going on for a while, releasing a lot of Gundam-related figures along with some other robot properties here and there. I bought the RX-78-2 a while ago because it was on sale and I wanted to get the iconic Mobile Suit Gundam design.
Fuuuuuuuu …
It’s a tiny figure, and the line itself is tiny, but holy poop there is so much awesome packed into these things. I only have a small handful at this point but they’re crazy articulated, with accessories out the wazoo. And I’m not kidding about the articulation. I need to put together an article on the ones I have, but much like Kinnikuman, when I open one of these up I can’t stop fiddling with it. I’ve always been into robots so this pretty much scratches my itch like no other line has been able to.
5. I don’t care what they wear
Pablolobo recently(ish) did an article about the new costume Colossus will be wearing in an upcoming Marvel Legends figure. It hit on a couple of things that have been rattling around in my head. My initial reaction to that costume was that it wasn’t the classic one, so therefore it had to die and it sucked and it angers up my blood, get off my lawn and all that. But that’s the reaction I’ve almost been conditioned to have. I read dissenting opinions about it, and I kept having that “not classic” thought rattle around in my head, but it was a feeling that I was a little disconnected to.
Then it hit me: I’ve allowed myself to be backed into a thought process. This “us versus them” mentality of modern versus classic or “good” costumes versus “bad” costumes. I realized that I genuinely didn’t care about giving fashion critiques to superhumans. I don’t have it in me to assign an aesthetic quality to spandex anymore.
Nothing’s ugly. Nothing’s gaudy. I’m cool with it. There’s no good or bad. There just is. It’s what they wear. I don’t even care if it’s Jim Lee or Rob Liefeld. How long can you stay angry at pouches? Who cares? I’ve hit the Danny Glover ratio. I’m too old for this ish. I’m open.
Except for Superman’s trunks. Those need to come back.
4. Man, Mattel’s Filmation Evil-Lyn was kind of a mess.
There’s no lengthy writeup to this one. I’m not going to be tossing her in the trash, but yeah, someone painted her face with their knuckles. I guess it could be worse. I don’t usually nitpick this stuff to death, but this one tested even my broad toy standards. Just hold it together a little while longer, Matty. Don’t get all 12th grader on us yet.
3. How about a round of applause to NECA for making good on 8 years of anticipation by getting out the Shredder and Foot Clan?
Seriously, that was a long-as-hell wait, but it eventually happened, and our collections are the better for it. Now if those quarter-scale movie Turtles can get shrunk down, and that Shaw Bros. Line can somehow get a magical resurrection, that would be awesome.
2. I don’t want to get into the Loyal Subjects stuff.
I really don’t. I only have two. That’s enough.
Hey, look at that. That’s me, tryign to get all “willpowery” about something. I’ve said that before about … so many other things.
But I wanted the Trap Jaw. He was pretty cool, how about just a couple more. Maybe Man-E-Faces. And Tri-Klops. And …
Oh, G.I. Joe? Well, maybe I can stop at …
No. I can’t stop at just Snake Eyes. I know I can’t. I’ll try. But I won’t.
I won’t.
I’m doomed.
And that leads me to my number one thought on toys today
1. I know myself.
I do. I’ve been acquainted with myself for a long time now. And you know what? In all that time, I’ve learned at least one thing: I’m probably going to want it.
Because of that, there’s often another discovery that goes hand-in-hand: I’m going to regret not getting it.
So that’s where I am. I’ve reached a nice, comfortable place where I can actually prognosticate my own desires, and get a toy for a property that I haven’t exposed myself to but absolutely know I’ll want the toys when I do.
I bought NECA’s Rocky figures without having actually watched any of the Rocky movies. Yes, I had managed to stay oblivious to the films for that long, don’t ask me why. But once I saw them, I knew I’d want them if I watched the movies. Sure enough, got the Blu-ray set, already had the figures, was glad.
Some things I know I’m not going to want. It’s very strange what does tweak my interests and what doesn’t, but I’ve become a very good judge of which property will make me want the toys.
It’s made catching up much easier.
These have been ten thoughts on toys.