Boy, that title is a mouthful, huh? Buying toys based on tv shows can go one of two ways. Sometimes you only want the main characters, the ones with the most screentime, which means if you’re into getting figures from Breaking Bad you might just want Jesse and Walt, and then only in a specific costume, like the hazmat suits. Other times, you might want to collect an entire ensemble, like getting everyone from Seinfeld, right down to the Soup nazi.
I’m in both camps, depending on the shows. I’d be all in on Seinfeld Legends, or if something like an Andy Griffith line came about I’d grab everyone up to and including Malcolm Merriweather. (If you get that reference you’re awesome.)
But sometimes I don’t need every character. Sometimes I just need a representational icon from the show, someone to buy once, sit back and say “there…that’s (to me) the best character from that show.” It doesn’t mean I wouldn’t buy more if they were made, but if that was the only character made…I’d be satisfied.
So in no particular order, here are the top five characters from dramatic shows that I’d buy and be satisfied with.
Al Swearengen, Deadwood
“The world ends when you’re dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a man… and give some back.”
The complicated cutthroat who sits at the black heart of Deadwood is one of the best characters created for the small screen in any genre. Played to endless fascination by Ian McShane, Al Swearengen was a gold mine of quotes, attitude and icy glares, and made every second of an excellent show even better just by sheer presence. While I wouldn’t be averse to an entire Deadwood action figure line, having just a Swearengen figure would be enough.
Omar Little, The Wire
“You come at the king, you best not miss.”
The Wire was filled with imperfect people making their way in a world in the only way they knew how. The good guys were never squeaky clean, the bad guys carried their own perverse codes of conduct, and in between the two, true monsters lived. Omar straddled every line, a thief who robbed the drug-dealers and did what he had to to survive. Neither hero noe villain, he was an exploiter of a corrupt system, and, he didn’t carry around a shotgun just for show. His character typifies the grimy moral complexities of the show, and if I could only get one character from the show, he’d be it.You feel me?
Boyd Crowder, Justified
“I’ve been accused of being a lot of things. “Inarticulate” ain’t one of them.”
A self-described outlaw, Boyd Crowder would not have been out of place in Deadwood. Walton Goggins (who has the name of a cartoon chicken) was electric in every scene as Boyd rampaged his way through a drug-infested backwoods town. His eloquent interplay with nearly every character he came across–none of whom able to outmatch his penchant for flowery turns-of-phrase–were hightlights of the show.
Thomas Shelby, Peaky Blinders
”I don’t pay for my suits. My suits are on the house or the house burns down.”
The head of an Irish family of criminals, Thomas is the morally corrupt hardass that has to keep a group of similar people in line, while doing what he can to maintain power and order in the face of everyone else. A figure of Thomas with his signature (and titular) peaky blinder would be a great thing to get from this show.
Helena, Orphan Black
“When I was seven the nun said I had devils inside me.”
Helena, a frizzy, blonde-haired russian assassin, was one of the more unique of a handful of large group of clones portrayed by Tatiana Maslany in this complex show. Maslany’s acting was so good as individual characters that all have the same face that you forget at times that it’s all the same actress. While every clone was a full, complete character, it was the character of Helena who made every scene that she was in better—even if she was acting across from herself. Which you forget while you’re watching the show. She’s just that good of an actress, and it’s just that interesting a character.
That’s my five!
