Toy Fair is almost here. I have never been so serious about something as I am about that. It is literally about to happen all over our collective faces. This year we have had a number of early images, leaks, fake images and the usual assorted news about Marvel Legends that keep the forum in bidness. Speculation has become an official bodily function. We want to know what’s happening, and we want to know now. We’re looking for clues everywhere. We’re looking for clues to the rest of the Venom wave in our morning cereal. We’re trying to figure out who else will be in the 10th anniversary MCU offerings by counting the bubbles in our shampoo. Is that song on the radio trying to tell us something? Do people still listen to the radio? So many questions.
Like most, I am ready to know the answers to these all important questions. Most of all, I just want to see the damn toys. With so much information out there, I’m starting to wonder if there will be any surprises left for Toy Fair, or if it will be a rundown of the checklist of things we kind of know about but aren’t quite sure about. In any event, based on rumors and speculation, I’m going to run down the top five figures I’m hoping to see this year.
Cloak
Cloak and Dagger have been rumored for a while, but have recently shown up on one of those fancypants computer lists that list a rundown of figures ,this time about a BAF Sp//der figure. While nothing is for certain until it’s sitting on a peg (I’ve been burned too many times to trust anything anywhere) I’m going to assume this is close enough to legitimate that I can talk about it.
I know what I don’t want with Cloak: I don’t want him to be bodiless, and I don’t want a plastic cape. I think I’ll be happy with one of those — The Marvel Universe figure had a body, so I think they won’t be repeating the colossal mistake the Diamond Select figure made — but it’s the cape where I’m sure I won’t be completely happy. I want a fabric cape. A big, honking overdone fabric cape with a wire in it. There’s no other way to make him right, I don’t care what the anti-fabric people say. But I have no doubt he’ll have a plastic cape. Hopefully it’s not dinky.
Magneto
Magneto has had a rough time. His ML3 figure was a repurposed Iron man and is desperately old, and the more recent one was terrible in many ways and hard to acquire. While I’m hoping for a good classic version on the Reaper body, I’ll probably be happy with that red and black version from the recent comics. My preference would be for the classic Magneto, because if at first you screw it up, you continue on until you do it right, and learn not to make such mistakes in the first place, now get out of my face. Or something. I know he’s worn a black and white one recently, but I prefer him with some red in his costume. If I can’t get the obviously superior red and purple, I’ll settle for red and black.
Doctor Octopus
The old ToyBiz Doctor Octopus was one of their best figures, and in many ways has held up a lot better than many of TB’s other offerings. But a brand new figure would no doubt be superior in many ways. Or at least, that’s what I’d assume. But there’s so many ways to go with him. Do you go straight classic like the TB figure? Do you switch it up and put him in his suit? Do you do that newish Doctor Octopus figure that’s existed for all of three minutes? These are all very important questions, but most important of all would be his tentacles. There was some artistic license going on with the ToyBiz tentacles. I’d love for them to have a more streamlined look to them, to emulate the plain metal tubes of his comic arms. Would they do bendy wire? Multiple ball joints? Something else? They need to be insanely articulated, so if they can work out a way to do a perfect set of Ock arms, they can reuse them for any number of variations.
Thing
We are so close to a unified Fantastic Four. They haven’t been “perfect,” but even imperfect, they’re still the best we’ve ever had. Thing will be the last, and I’m hoping we’re all put out of our misery and he’s shown. We all seem to have our personal preference for Thing. For me, I need him to be a certain height and to at least have two heads: a closed mouth for people like me, and open mouth that can have the stupid teeth that all the wrong people want him to have. I’m pretty sure I will need deep therapy if he only comes with single head with gritted teeth. I will lose it!
But really, ever since this Walgreens FF journey began, Thing has been hanging overtop the entire endeavor like a Sword of Damocles made of rock. It will be nice to finally see him, to know if I will be buying one for every room of my house, or if I will be scowling for the rest of February.
And finally:
Spider-Ham
Talk about empty hope. Before Spider-verse, I wouldn’t have believed Spider-ham would have an actual chance at a Marvel Legends figure. He’s always popped up in the back of my mind as a “it would be great if” type of thing, but it wasn’t a thing I believed could ever happen. Comic books and toys are terribly serious, don’t you know, and there didn’t seem to be room for a little guy named Peter Porker.
But along came Spider-verse, which not only legitimized every single character that has ever worn a spider on their chest, it also gave them a fighting shot at a figure. In a world where spider-Punk exists in plastic, Spider-Ham can reap the benefits. Is it swine time? It is most definitely swine time. I can’t wait to buy him from Hamazon. I might be a greedy pig, but I’ll buy several of him. Hell, I’d hog them all if I could. The excitement is porcine through my veins. I bring home the bacon, I can spend it how I want!
…
Insert chitterling reference here.
So yeah, Thing and Spider-Ham are at the top of the list, but hopefully all five of these will be making an appearance, along with all of those other figures. Luckily I don’t have to wait long. If you’re hoping to see something, leave a comment and let us all know. Unless it’s a Thing with teeth, in which case I’m calling the bouncer.