One week from now, we will all be embarking on what appears to be the end of Dark Knight’s greatest video game saga. It’s one that has literally redefined a character in a proud and powerful way, distinctive from the Chris Nolan blockbuster franchise as well as the top-10 comic family of books. And, I dare say, it has done a better job of maintaining the essence of the character than even the comics have been able to manage these last New-52 years.
But before that saga began, before it was even a fond dream in our hearts and a spark in a developer’s mind, we had this ***-sucking, motherless piece of dog****.
Batman Dark Tomorrow is the worst kind of bad game. When announced at E3 way back in 2001, it did the most insidious thing a bad game can do — It looked awesome.
Originally planned to be an open-world game, not unlike the Spider-Man games of the same era, this one was going to add some Grand Theft Auto goodness like a Batmobile and Batplane. Even better, this game was based not on the dismal movies, or even going back to the Animated Series (which wouldn’t have been a bad thing), this game was going to be based on the comics. And the Batman comics of the late 1990s and early 2000s were good stuff. Add to that an accomplished story team of comic scribe Scott Peterson and Kenji Terada of the Final Fantasy series, and you’ve got everything looking right for a Batman game that would finally quench those dying for a real representation of the Dark Knight.
That’s some dirty pool. What we ended up with was a terribly limited and barely playable game that destroyed any interesting plot points of cut scenes by… well, making you try and play the game to get to the next part. The games vehicle and AI elements were dramatically short of the sell, and the open world was scaled back so far that it wouldn’t even qualify as a pseudo-open-world game. It’s also been rumored that the intended fighting mechanics were drastically bastardized before completion. Nobody actually knows why this all turned so bad, although it’s worth noting the game was originally billed as a Nintendo GameCube exclusive, but then changed to a joint GameCube/Xbox exclusive. Me? I blame Obama. Oh! I forgot, it was 2003. I blame Bush.
Whatever the excuse, it’s not a good enough one. There was okay voiceacting — I want to say it’s Sam from Red Dead Revolver, the CGI cutscenes and the overall graphic content is actually not bad for the time. The score was done by an orchestra, and, as I mentioned, there’s a decent story in there too. So what’s the worst kind of crap sandwich? The kind where you put it on fresh-baked bread with some nice deli mustard and some homemade potato salad on the side. Faulty camera, bad controls, glitches, inconsistent (if existent) AI, no replay value, and unclear objectives. Should you somehow make it through to find out the true master behind the game’s evil plot, good luck getting the “correct” ending. I never made it that far.
This is the only Batman game I’m truly ashamed of and that I hate playing. Maybe because it’s a piece of my more “recent” history, but I remember how excited everyone was after E3. I remember how incredible the cinematics looked. And then I remember wanting to pitch it through my TV after the first hour.
I had intended to take this game up to the range and put a .45 through the case, but I forgot it last time. But I WILL eventually shoot this damn thing, and I will make damn sure to post a pic when I do. It’s a cathartic, circle of life kinda thing — Batman’s parents were gunned down, and that was unjust, so therefore I must gun down this terrible game and restore balance.
Seriously, though. More than any other game I have reviewed — DON’T play this one.
